


Real Men Don't Wear Orlesian

by MostHopelessofRomantics



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Origins
Genre: F/M, Orleeeeeeeesians suck, Sexual Humor, Terrible Gift
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-19
Updated: 2015-12-19
Packaged: 2018-05-07 16:37:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 239
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5463596
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MostHopelessofRomantics/pseuds/MostHopelessofRomantics
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Moira and Loghain receive a gift from Leliana.</p>
<p>A quick drabble <3</p>
            </blockquote>





	Real Men Don't Wear Orlesian

**Author's Note:**

  * For [bainsidhe](https://archiveofourown.org/users/bainsidhe/gifts).



> Inspired by a conversation about whose dick was bigger. Obviously Loghain has the king of hammers, and Jim was so incredibly awed that he offered up his Orlesian diamond-encrusted cockring to the lord of massive cocks.

“Let’s see what Leliana got us,” Moira purred as she rolled out from under her husband and reached for the delicately wrapped box in the nightstand drawer. “She swears we will love it, and she has very good taste.”  
Loghain cursed her timing. He hadn’t seen his wife in weeks, and was thoroughly enjoying their reunion sex.

“That Orlesian interrupts us so often, even her gifts are cockblockers.”

His wife gave him a wry smile. “You weren’t complaining about the tethers she gave us for our anniversary.”

“I didn’t have to stop fucking you for those.”

She handed him the small box and leaned back against the headboard, watching him intently. He sat back on his heels, removed the pale wrapping, and opened the lid.

“What in the Void is this?” he asked, pulling a diamond-studded ring from the package. He looked up at Moira. “Is this...what I think it is?”  
Desire flashed in her eyes and she nibbled on her bottom lip.

“Mhmmm.”

Loghain harrumphed and jumped from the bed. Stark naked, he marched over to the window and pitched the magnificent cockring out into the canyon below. Before Moira could protest, he pulled the leather lacing from his trousers and wrapped it around the base of his impossibly large cock. Her eyed roved hungrily over him, and she opened her legs in invitation. Smiling devilishly, he swaggered back to their bed.

“Real men don’t wear Orleeeeesian.”


End file.
